Cannabis and Kink: A Dominatrix’s Perspective
Please note:
The use of any substance during any BDSM/kink activity is inherently risky. As someone who has spent many years navigating this hazy space, I believe it’s important to approach this topic with both curiosity and care. Cannabis is not for everyone and it should be consumed responsibly.
With that said, let’s get into one of my favourite ways to inspire connection, creativity, and brain-oozing submission: weed.
Why Blend BDSM and Cannabis?
BDSM isn’t just about whips and chains—it’s about connection, trust, and exploring ourselves. Cannabis, with its ability to promote bodily relaxation and heightened sensory awareness, can complement these elements beautifully. For many, it serves as a tool to ease tension, open minds, and deepen the experience.
From my perspective, incorporating cannabis into kink and BDSM can enhance the energy exchange between scene partners. It helps participants focus on the moment, quiet external distractions, and create a more immersive experience. This applies to both Dominant and submissive roles, essentially fostering a sense of flow and connection between the two.
Proceeding With Care
While cannabis has the potential to enhance BDSM experiences for many individuals, it’s essential to recognize that it isn’t universally beneficial or suitable for everyone. People’s responses to cannabis can vary significantly—what might deepen sensations and promote relaxation for one person could lead to feelings of distraction, discomfort, or even heightened anxiety for another. These differences underline the importance of self-awareness and thoughtful consideration when incorporating cannabis into kink scenes.
The key to successfully integrating cannabis into BDSM lies in approaching the experience with an open mind and prioritizing clear, honest communication. Before introducing cannabis into a scene, take time to discuss boundaries, expectations, and potential effects with your play partner(s). It’s wise to start with a low dose to gauge its impact on both your physical and emotional state. By taking it slow, you create room to observe how cannabis influences the dynamics of the scene, your reactions, and your play partner’s needs.
Throughout the experience, staying attuned to your scene partner’s comfort and well-being is crucial. Regular check-ins and maintaining a safe word or signal are non-negotiable safeguards. Safety should always be a priority, especially in scenes involving bondage, sensory deprivation, or anything where heightened awareness is crucial.
Choosing the Right Strain for Your Scene
Not all cannabis is created equal, and the strain you choose has the potential to make or break your scene. The effects of cannabis can vary widely depending on individual response, so it’s important to know how you personally react to certain strains before introducing any type of play. While I won’t give any specific recommendations, here are 3 general categories to keep in mind when it comes to choosing your strain:
Indica for Relaxation: Indica strains are known for their calming effects, making them ideal for slow, intimate scenes. They can be especially helpful for those who have a tough time dropping into their body or accessing subspace. Whether you’re engaging in impact-play, hypno-play, or just basking in the aftercare glow, an indica can help make everything extra vibey (if you know you know).
Because indica strains tend to produce a feeling of heaviness in the body, they will often prevent someone from moving quickly (which can be very fun to play with). For a medical role-play scene I once used a volcano vaporizer as an “anaesthesia” device, sending a vaporized indica directly into my patient’s mouth through a plastic tube. This made the anaesthesia-play feel more realistic as it immediately made my submissive patient feel heavy, dreamy and dazed. From a harm reduction perspective, cannabis is significantly less risky than other substances that are used for this type of play like poppers or nitrous.
Sativa for Energy and Creativity: For those playful, high-energy scenes, a sativa strain can spark creativity and heighten sensations. Think role-play, rope work, tickle torture or teasing with a Wartenberg wheel. Because of the “buzzy” effects it has on the mind, it’s important to approach sativa strains with caution if you take stimulants, experience anxiety, or have recently had caffeine.
Hybrids for Balance: When you want the best of both worlds, hybrids provide a balanced experience that supports both relaxation and alertness. This can be particularly useful for navigating more complex dynamics or exploring new activities.
Integrating Cannabis into Your Rituals
In D/s or M/s dynamics, cannabis can be weaved into service-oriented rituals. For example, the scene could be structured to begin with the submissive rolling a perfect joint at their Dominant’s feet. If the joint passes inspection, they must then serve as a human ashtray while their Dominant gets to enjoy it.
In my personal life, one of my favourite forms of aftercare is having my hair brushed while vaping an indica strain. I find it incredibly soothing, plus I am receiving an act of service which ultimately reinforces the D/s dynamic.
Incorporating cannabis into BDSM play can also become a deeply enriching aspect of the ritual itself. Engaging in the shared experience of consuming cannabis—whether through passing a joint, hitting a vape, enjoying an edible or sharing a tincture—offers a unique opportunity to foster connection and intimacy with your scene partner. This shared moment can serve as a prelude to the scene, helping everyone involved center their thoughts, set intentions, and establish a mutual sense of presence.
By creating a relaxed and mindful state, cannabis can enhance emotional and physical awareness, allowing participants to fully immerse themselves in the experience ahead. This intentional act not only deepens the bond between scene partners but also prepares the body and mind to embrace the sensations, dynamics, and vulnerabilities that BDSM often entails.
You can listen to me talk more about cannabis and kink on episode 420 of the Bed Post Podcast. 👇