First Session at the Dungeon? Here’s What To Expect

It’s probably not as scary as you think…

New clients often don’t know what to expect when they arrive at the dungeon for the very first time. Media portrayals of dungeons, Dominatrices and kink/BDSM sessions are often misleading. Many people assume that they will be ambushed as soon as they open the door, or that I’ll immediately throw a gag in their mouth and start whipping them the moment they arrive. In realty, this is never the case.

Unless we have negotiated otherwise, here is a practical breakdown of how a session in the dungeon is actually structured.

Please keep in mind that this will vary depending on the Dominant you are seeing. I am only providing a framework for the way I personally operate in the dungeon.

Arrival:

When you arrive I will come greet you at the door and welcome you inside. You will have the opportunity to remove your shoes/coat/etc. and use the washroom. I will kindly remind you to provide me with your tribute if you haven’t done so already and we’ll transition into our negotiation/check-in.

Negotiation/Check-In:

Before getting started with any type of play, we’ll sit down together for a brief conversation about scene expectations, safety protocols, boundaries/limits, accessibility requirements and aftercare. I may ask questions about how you’re feeling that day, if you have any goals in mind for the session, or anything else that is relevant to our time together. Our focus here is establishing a sense of connection and security.

Transition:

Once our conversation is finished I’ll give you a moment to un/dress and we’ll start to gradually transition into the scene. At this time I usually like to do a little bit of breath work and intention setting to help us both sink into our bodies and settle into the space.

The Scene:

The “scene” is the play portion of the session where we actually do the things that we talked about doing. I will guide and facilitate all activities during this time, encouraging you to engage with me as appropriate and to advocate for yourself as needed.

Connection and trust tend to deepen significantly as the scene progresses, allowing for a transformative journey of self-discovery and personal fulfilment. This evolving bond creates a safe space where fantasies can be explored openly and desires can be expressed freely.

Approximately 20 - 30 minutes before the session is over we will focus on reaching the scene’s climax and transitioning into aftercare.

Aftercare:

A small amount of time will be reserved for aftercare before you prepare to leave. Aftercare in BDSM refers to the essential emotional, mental, and physical care that is given to all participants following a BDSM scene or activity. This process ensures that everyone involved feels supported and safe as they transition back into “normal” life. You can learn more about aftercare in a different blog post.

Departure:

A minimum of 5 minutes will be set aside for you to get dressed, carefully collect your belongings, use the washroom as needed and ensure that you get out the door on time without any unnecessary rush or stress.